Be Mine by Lizzy Barber

Timy reviews Be Mine, a standalone psychological thriller by Lizzy Barber.

I received an ARC from Datura Books in exchange for an honest review.

Possible fit for The Sound of Madness Reading Challenge 2025 prompts:

Joker prompt that goes with anything: Freed from Desire

When Beth joins wellness group ‘Elixir,’ she thinks it is the answer to everything. So why, ten years later, is she still running from them? And what do they want from her, now?

Beth is a new mother struggling to find her place in the world. She is exhausted, mentally and physically, but her anxieties are not simply the fears of a first-time mum. A terror burns in her, fuelled by a secret past she is lucky to have escaped. When a letter arrives, bearing only the infinity symbol, Beth knows immediately it is from them. And that her past is finally catching up with her…

Ten years earlier, on the heels of a messy breakup, Beth meets the effervescent Marissa who introduces her to “Elixir” – a health and wellness organisation that she promises will change Beth’s life forever. She  quickly becomes intoxicated and convinced it is the solution to all her problems. No task is too great, even as the gruelling exercise classes become more frequent, even as the therapy sessions become more costly, even as their ‘requests’ become ‘demands,’ Beth convinces herself this is what she wants. 

Then, when she falls for the brand’s enigmatic leader, Tate, she can’t imagine life without Elixir. But as Beth’s star begins to rise, Marissa’s starts to fall. And though Marissa tries to warn her of the darkness lurking beneath the brand’s gleaming exterior, Beth finds she cannot let go.  

Be Mine is a story about finding our place in the world today, and where we turn to belong in a godless modern society.

“San Fransisco was, for want of a better phrase, a mindfuck. Unlike London, prone to tradition and stagnation, here optimism crackled in the air like electricity.”

From the moment I heard about Be Mine, I knew I had to get my hands on it. I’m super fascinated with cults (hopefully not in a creepy way), and I *think* I read it somewhere that this book was at least partly inspired by NXVIM (which I could believe, reading it), about which I saw a documentary and read articles. Anyway. I was happy when the ARC landed on my doorstep (actually it got handed over to me by the delivery man, but you know…) and couldn’t wait to jump on it. Wasn’t sure whether I would be able to review it by release day, but since I read over 250 pages in one single day over the weekend, well, here we are.

Be Mine tells the story of Beth in a dual timeline – on one hand, we follow her as she gets sucked into Elixir after a series of traumas that makes her leave the UK and move to San Fransisco thanks to a job transfer and on the other hand, we see her 10 years later, a new mom, struggling with keeping it together. Especially when it seems like that Elixir found her once again after she left them quite abruptly. I liked how the parallel worked in favor of the book – as Elizabeth (as she becomes known within Elixir after meeting the charismatic founder, Tate) gets higher within the organization, reaching higher and higher levels, Beth starts to sink into paranoia, not knowing anymore what’s real and what isn’t.

Be Mine is not going to be for everyone, not least because it has a slow pace and not a lot of things happen in the majority of the book. And I think it suited this story, I enjoyed getting deeper and deeper and was compelled to read on, to find out whether Beth is going crazy, and what exactly happened in the past that made her run away for so long. However, the last quarter or so felt way too rushed, and it felt like it ended quite abruptly. Up to that point, Barber masterfully built up the tension, and I’m not usually one to say this, but Be Mine could have benefited from another 100 pages or so to execute the endgame properly. To really bring home the impact of everything. It felt more like a slap than the proper punch it should have been.

This is a difficult review to write, because I’m trying not to talk too much about either the plot or the characters for fear of spoilers, but that doesn’t leave me much to work with. I thought most of the characters were totally on point – I could sympathize with Beth being a mother with a newborn (not that I have any experience there) and struggling despite her husband, who she could depend on. Despite the frustrations on both ends. I wish Adam got a bit more agency to get to know him on a deeper level to understand his motivations. I also could sympathize with the younger Beth, being alone in a new country, not having any friends after the traumas she went through. It’s understandable why she got sucked into Elixir.

Although, as time goes on, it gets harder to look past her decisions and understand why she got so deep into an organisation that exploits her and makes her believe that it’s all for her own good and improvement. Then again, if one never gets associated with such cults, it’s hard to see what’s going on in a desperate person’s mind. The kind these cults prey upon. Until you get so low in your life that you gladly grab at anything that promises to get you out of it, you never really know how easy it is to get brainwashed, no matter how smart you are otherwise. All that said, it was easy to see why older Beth reacted the way she did in some situations, and I think Barber did grab the psychological aspect of her character very well.

The fact that the founder of the cult, Tate only gets a minor role in the plot makes his character more mysterious, but also somehow takes the power from him, as we get the POV of those whom he harmed. And even when he makes an appearance whether in person or through excerpts – Elixir manifesto, interview – it comes through how much of a creep he is, and I think that works a lot better than if he was present all the way through.

Be Mine is a slow burn psychological thriller about wellness cults, motherhood and the past that always catches up with us. Once it sucks you in, it’s as hard to put down as it is to get out of Elixir. Definitely gives one a lot of food for thought, and I think this one will stay with me for a while yet, despite some of my complaints.